Being present is a learned behavior. We have to fight with so many things taking so much of our time daily. I’m learning more and more to be present in my relationships. If I am always chasing after the future and never living in the moment, then I run the risk of missing out on what life truly has to offer each day. Every second, minute, hour, or day is a gift from God.
Sometimes when moving too fast, I have to calm myself down by meditating, counting to 10, or taking deep breaths. It puts me back into introspect. Always rushing and not living in the present can give you anxiety. According to a Healthline article, “Anxiety is your body’s natural response to stress. It is a feeling of fear or apprehension about what’s to come.” Anxiety can make you feel sick, a symptom of it is shortness of breath. Sometimes the cure is to slow down and enjoy the present moment. If I am always living for the future, I might end up missing out on what life has to offer today. When we step into God’s lane, we become too overwhelmed with thinking about the future, and it brings on extreme anxiousness. The root cause of anxiety is fear. You have to ask yourself, what are you afraid of, because God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, and love, and a sound mind. You have to really get to the bottom of why you are afraid, Beth Moore said it best, “ to walk in truth with healthy bones, every who told you that?” needs tracing back to God , and if incongruent, it needs tossing.” If someone tells you, you will never be anything. Find in the scripture, where God says, you are the head, and not the tail above and not beneath. Then toss out who told you that you were not enough, because that is a lie. I am a planner, I tend to plan things ahead of time, but I know when I start to feel uneasy or when my head starts to hurt, I need to take a break or take a step back and consult with God, because I may be putting too much pressure on myself and too much in own my hands. When the real issue is, I have not asked God what is His plan right now. If it was my choice, I would be doing multiple things right now, but I am not a Robot, and God gives me boundaries. He has not called me to everything. Sometimes I have to take a backseat to somethings. For most of my college career, I could remember myself being the leader for almost everything, especially class projects. I am the one that was always delegating who does what and getting it done. I can remember that in every group project that I have had, there is someone who does not do their part, and as a result, the slack is left to the leader. I have learned you do not always have to be the one calling all the shots all the time to make a difference, and if you are, you are likely an exhausted leader. You have to allow others to lead as well and be responsible for their part.
We are designed to live off of God’s word. In Matthew 4:4: ‘”Jesus answered, ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.”This word is not intended to last us for weeks, without another word. We are supposed to get refilled daily and build off of the word to help us walk by faith and get direction. For example, I listen to sermons frequently to get direction and encourage my spirit. If I am just leaning on one word that I got a year ago, I will be in trouble because sometimes you need clarity in how to walk that faith out. Sometimes your spirit needs to be encouraged. It’s too much going on in the world, to hear from God once a year. To be victorious, we have to stay in the word, pray, go to church, listen to sermons, and worship. From my experience when I’m not in the word daily I began to get anxious. My flesh starts to try to take over. This reminds me of the Israelites when they were in the desert and God provided manna for them daily, but they had to trust God. God instructed Moses to tell the Israelites not to save the manna, but to trust Him daily. In Exodus 16:4 it reads, “Then the Lord said to Moses, I will rain down bread from heaven for you. The people are to go out each day and gather enough food for that day. In this way I will test them and see whether they will follow my instructions. On the sixth day they are to prepare what they bring in, and that is to be twice as much as they gather on the other days.” The Israelites were tested daily to see if they would believe God. The Israelites assignment was to go out each day to pick manna (food), but on the sixth day they were expected to pick double the amount so they would not have to work on Sunday, (Sabbath day). We too are tested daily by God to see if we can follow instructions. Sometimes to even see if we are ready for a promotion. To be able to pass these tests, we have to renew our spirits daily to get through whatever trials may come our way, because in this life you will need faith. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing the word of God. I’ve learned whatever has your ear, has you! That could be negativity or gossiping to name a few. It could also be positivity and encouragement. You want to build your life up with positivity and encouragement. You have to find ways to strategize so that you can exercise and build up your faith. Anytime you are planning to win something you have to plan in order to do so. Faith is the same way. There were times when the Israelites disobeyed God. When they did not trust God’s instructions their food rotted. Exodus 16:19, reads, “Then Moses said to them, “No one is to keep any of it until morning. However, some of them paid no attention to Moses; they kept part of it until morning, but it was full of maggots and began to smell. Moses was angry with them.” To win our battles, we have to follow God’s instructions, to reap the benefits of our promises. When we fail to do so, we tend to lose hope, get anxious, and depressed.
Always living in and for the future can cause anxiety. We are not designed to live in the future, Matthew 6: 34 says, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, let tomorrow worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” I’ve realized when I’m so busy worried about tomorrow I end up neglecting life today. God has graced us for what we are living for on today. I’ve even heard plenty of times that we spend so much time worrying about what will happen, and what we are worried about usually never even happens most of the time, and we’ve just made a mountain out of a molehill. We have made a small element in our lives a big giant. When things come into our lives that worry us, we have to cast every care to God and leave it there. In 1 Peter 5:7, it says “cast your cares upon God, because He cares for you.” You have to have faith to lay your problems at Jesus’s feet. Hebrews 11:1 says, “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for the evidence of things not yet seen,” It says, now faith…not tomorrow’s faith but now…faith. In the moment faith, in the present faith.
Being present is also detrimental in our relationships. I’m a “boy” aunt!!! Meaning I have all boys as nephews who I love so dearly. & If I am always focused on myself and never focused on them then I run the risk of missing out on what life has to offer while they are young!!!! Having a chance to really be in their lives and watch them grow older is a major flex for me. But being apart of their lives and having a relationship with them means so much more. My oldest nephew has grown so fast. He has gotten very tall and his voice has gotten deeper. He’s growing up so fast on me and I’d wish he’d slow down, but a person just can’t grow from 3 to 6 feet overnight. He has been growing gradually little by little; in the in between stages. We don’t want to be so focused on the growing that we miss the process in the middle. Hugging him, nurturing him, being there for him means so much more. My youngest nephew had a birthday party the other week that I attended and while I was there the only thing he wanted to do was play with me. He didn’t want me to leave him, he just wanted to play with me the whole time. It was actually the sweetest thing. & I can tell you now, I can get revelation out of anything. When I got home and had time to think about it I believe that, that’s the same way God is with us. All He wants to do is be with us and it doesn’t matter what we do. He just wants us to be present with Him and able to recognize Him in every moment. Sometimes we become so busy to include God in our day to day lives. We think we have to do this and do that, but He only wants us to invite Him in whatever we’re doing at that moment of time.
In different seasons in my life, I have been able to spend more time with God. In one season, I was able to spend a lot of time with Him, but in another season I was struggling to be able to have time. One season I could get up at 5 am in the morning and spend time with God in another season it was harder for me. And if you’re not careful you can start to think that God is not pleased, but from my experience, I’ve learned to invite God in whatever it is that I am doing. I remember hearing this Tasha Cobbs song feat William Murphy and it says, “ All day I’ve been walking around trying to spend more time with you….”Basically, it means you don’t just have to converse with God at a set time. You have an opportunity to converse with God all the time throughout the day, all day. When I’m in school, when I’m in my bed, when I’m at the store, wherever I am, I can spend time with God. But if you are more advanced, you can set alarms to remind you to pray and spend time with the Lord as well. It’s just what suits you and what feels right with your spirit.
Moving back closer to my family was a God move for me that required me to be present. I’ll talk more about that in my book, but God called me to move back. It was one of the best things I could have done for myself. I’ve been gone for 10 years and generally, I’m a busy person and I’m always kind of on the move thinking about the next thing that I am going to do. I’ve realized that everything I have been searching for is already on the inside of me, I just need to develop it and work on what I got! I’ve also learned that if everything is a priority, then nothing is a priority. I have two planners, one personal planner and a work planner, and both of my planners were filled to the tea; a couple of weeks ago. I felt like I had no time to complete anything. But then as I began to invite God into my plans and become more present the work began to lessen. I began to get leverage. When I was doing only what I wanted to do sometimes things seemed so heavy or even felt like a burden, but as I allowed God into every task, He made my load easier. It was almost like He was carrying the weights for me. I was no longer rushing trying to get things done. I had to start small and build. I’m reminded when God says do not despise small beginnings, hard work pays off. A little in the potter’s hands can manifest into a lot. But as I’ve moved closer to my family, I’ve become more present and balanced. I’ve had the opportunity to focus on building my relationships. When I was distant, I couldn’t see my family as often as I would have liked, and sometimes I felt like I missed important events at times. I didn’t just want to be a distant person, I wanted to be with my family at times when I couldn’t. But either way, I’ve learned, regardless if you are distant or away you have to fight to be present. A person can live in your house and not be present, it’s a way of thinking of training your mind. There are so many distractions and so many things that call for our attention. People change and you have to be willing to grow with that person. Some people you might be around while you were younger, you may no longer hang out with today. It is just sometimes people grow apart and people change. You may have different hobbies, you may have moved and it’s not a bad thing. But at times what you don’t stay in contact with, won’t grow. Now I do have some friends that I don’t have to talk to a lot and we just pick back up where we left off, but I do have friends that I talk to at least once a week and I have some friends that I talk to once a day. Every relationship is different and it requires different maintenance. The people that I talk to every day are more than likely my best friends in life. Talking to God every day is a must for me, when I don’t l, I become grouchy and my flesh tries to take over. I have to have constant communication with Him. That relationship requires me to be present to cast all my cares on Him, because when I don’t anxiety starts to creep in. I find myself caring too much weight that I’m not designed to hold. People change and you can’t love someone the same way you used to love them at an older stage in their life. As you grow older you start to mature and want different things out of life. And that’s the same way with God the more you get to know Him the more the relationship grows. Like for instance, when I first begin reading my Bible and praying it was something that I had to discipline myself to be able to do. But as I began to grow and get to know God I depended on the Bible and I had to be present to be able to receive what He was giving me. When I worship God I have to be in that present moment to get my breakthrough. I cannot be thinking about what happened yesterday or the day before. I have to be in tune with that moment because my deliverance may be in that moment and I do not want to miss it.
God can speak through anyone to reach you, but you have to be present and willing to listen. I remember one day just praying to myself saying, God I need a prophetic word. & He heard my prayer. On that same day, a minister reached out to me and started prophesying into my life on that very day, and if I wasn’t present I may have missed it. God knows exactly what you need before you need it!
I’m a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend, a cousin, a teacher and all of those require being present! But I am my first ministry! Before I give out to others I have to make sure I’m good first!!! I can not give anybody what I do not have. That’s why daily, I’m taking care of myself and making sure that I am mentally, spiritually, physically, and emotionally good, because I’m no good to anyone else if I can’t be good to myself. If I am in a good headspace then I am able to do so, but it takes work to stay present!
I hope you guys are blessed by this post! Until next time. With love,
Destiney Foster.
